Posts Tagged ‘tears’

How do we Let Go after a Breakup?

There is the classic change your hair and eat ice cream. If the relationship was serious how do we adjust to single patterns? Like in Sex and the City, we are excited to revert to our secret single behaviors at the start of the breakup but then the reality sets in. We are single, along at night and craving the habits we had with our ‘other’.

We all know distraction, rebounding flirting, and life focus can help with the day-to day feelings – but what about at night? The only realistic answer is ‘time’ but who these days has time? I’m disabled and have to use all my time and energy on important stuff so it doesn’t feel wasted. This stupid break-up has wasted so much energy – among other things.

Because we can’t go back into time before our ex got ‘mean’ to talk to them for late night comfort. We miss our ex and they are a daydream or nightmare. Ultimately they are the last thing we actually want. My ex left me for his pride. And that’s something he can never recover from. I gave him my heart and he gave me some pride. I say that because before we broke up he saw “Say Anything” in the theatre without me, something that’s so wrong on so many levels.

So how do we recover? We wait. We try and sleep. We flirt. We focus. We rely on friends. We rely on pets and family… and we trust ourselves. That said, it’s never okay until it’s okay. So here’s to making it though another night. Do you have suggestions?

Today I went to the post office to close my PO Box. It was the last thing holding me back from 100% letting go of my relationship. I no longer have a reason to drive to that area.

Photo Shoot – Dark Eyes